April 14, 2009

Surprise Haircuts and Brutal Honesty


6YO had the top of her hair all gathered in a small rubber band. Being the independent soul that she is, she decided to do her own hair. The rubber band had to come out. Since she hates the tugging often required to get the hair band out of her hair, she decided to just use scissors to cut it out herself.

Yeah, she cut it out alright!
(Don't you just love how she's SMILING while posing for the picture that still creates a KNOT IN MY STOMACH?)

Hair today, gone tomorrow!!!
Would someone PLEASE wipe the grin off this kid's face???
I picked up my phone to call David at work and let him know what was going on, and it started to ring. He was calling me. Creepy.
As I told him the story, he started laughing. I guess he's immune to this sort of upset. This is actually 6YO's THIRD OFFENSE. She has cut her own hair three times! When she was three years old, she cut her own hair twice in six months. Since I took her to the same woman to fix it both times, I was sure she would contact Child Protective Services for letting my child play with scissors! I do not LET my child just play with scissors, but the kids seem to be better at finding the darn things than anyone. Many of you (I hope) understand how it is to have an extrememly independent child. Don't get me wrong....having an independent child has its perks. She's been pouring her own milk since she was two! She has also been using the microwave to make her own oatmeal for almost as long. (Yes, I was there to supervise her and she's ALL ABOUT following the rules, with the exception of the whole 'hair cutting thing' that is!)
And 13YO, being all about dramatic openings, told me about her mishap in her own way.
"Moooooooom. Ummm....you're not going to want to see this. Let me just tell you that [6YO] MISSED."
"And what exactly did she miss???"
"Weeeeeeelll....she was trying to cut the rubber band out of her own hair. And she missed."
This is where she pulls the large chunk of hair (still in the rubber band, mind you) from behind her back. I was talking to a friend on the phone at the time and I had to interrupt her a bit and tell her that I felt a little sick suddenly. Then I explained why.
I got off the phone with her to call David. As I'm pushing the first button, my phone rings. It's David. Spooky, I know!
"David? That's weird...I was just about to call you. Umm....[6YO] sort of cut her own hair. Again."
"WHA???"
"Yeah. Well, apparently she wasn't actually TRYING to cut her hair but the rubber band that was in her hair instead. She missed."
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!!"
"Why are you laughing? The rubber band was on the TOP of her head! OUR SIX YEAR OLD DAUGHTER HAS A MULLET!!!"
"HAHAHAHAHAHA"
"I'm really glad you think this is so funny! Our kindergartener looks like she just came from a KD LANG CONCERT and you can't stop laughing!
"HAHAHAHAHA!
She's just making memories, Sweetie!"


I'm glad he sees it that way. I had to haul booty into town to find a place that was open after 6:00. A lot of those places like to be going home about then, and I had a bad experience at Supercuts once myself and knew I wouldn't be taking her there. I found a place where some young guy in skinny jeans and his own mop of hair all leaning in the same sideways direction, defying gravity, was able to fix it the best he could. He really was a nice guy. When we discussed what he'd do, I told him I knew it would need layers to blend it all in. He agreed and we decided to take off quite a bit of the length so the short sections on top wouldn't be so obvious.

My six-year-old now has a more modern cut than I do! I played with the hot air brush this morning and was able to come up with something that (hopefully) will work at school.

Where did that smile go???

She still has a little section on top that is no more than an inch and a half to two inches long. That cannot be fixed and it was decided that we wouldn't try to make any more hair that short to try to even it out. For the time being, we will be using lots of clips and hairspray. It actually looks like it will grow into a really cute layered cut. Luckily, her hair tends to grow pretty quickly.


Right after she realized she cut her own hair, she decided to try to smooth it all back with hairspray to cover up her mistake. I couldn't take her in with hair like that and I needed a shower myself, so I hopped into the shower and had her join me to get her hair washed really quickly.

That was the last time that child will ever take a shower with me. Now, she's old enough to judge me.

"Eeewww...Mom...that's really gross. You should shave that. Oh...those are gross, too. There are two things that are gross about you. No wait...there are three things that are gross about you. Nooooo...okay, so there are FOUR things that are gross about you...."

"I'm going to stop you RIGHT THERE before you NEVER GET ANOTHER ALLOWANCE EVER AGAIN."

Somehow, my temper was a bit shorter yesterday than usual.

I CANNOT IMAGINE WHY....




6 comments:

Shannon said...

I do want to know where her smile is on the "after, after"

while reading this, I got that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach! and it's not my kid!! Hopefully next time she will ask her big sister or mom to help remove the elastic from her hair!!

Jessie said...

LOL! But she still looks so cute. Could be worse, right?

wildtomato said...

I was cringing and laughing as I read the part about her shower critique. Kid, you are pushing your luck...

Leann I Am said...

Shannon...she's moody in the mornings! I'm right there with you and the sinking feeling.

Jessie, she still looks cute, yes....but she's constantly reminding me that I'm NOT really in control! Who wants THAT around??

Wildtomato, you said it! STINKER! She'd better watch out, because this whole 'gravity thing' will catch up to her too, someday! And I hope to be the FIRST to point it out to her!

LCM1219 said...

Laughed til I cried!!

Yup, been there done that. Only it happened in a matter of *one week's time* with a three year old male. Three times he cut his hair. Last time down to the scalp. Barber had to buzz-cut his head.

After her shower comments I would have cut her allowance off for sure. LOL ...

AMY said...

ok so all i can do is hahahahahahaha sorry but I giggled so much my hubby started asking me what was wrong. My Lucy has cut her hair 2x and she is 5. Thanks for the heads up on the shower thing lol. Kids say the darndest things dont they lol. She is still absolutely adorable